Samuel's age test for Grand dad

Samuel's age test for Grand dad:

1. How old are you now?      June 10, 2018, I Turn 72. So I guess that makes me 71.    Does that feel “old” to you?

There are days I feel that old. I really do not see myself much different than I was at 50. I have a bad back. If I set in my chair and don’t have to walk I don’t feel old. I’m not sure I feel old when I must walk as much as my back hurts. 

2. Has your attitude about what is “old” changed over the years?

Yes, when I was younger old has was 50. Now Old is 90.

3. Do you feel differently about yourself now than you did 5 or 10 years ago? In what ways?

Since retirement, I have had to redefine significance, and purpose for living. Seeking value of one’s self becomes different. When working I felt I valued what I did as did others. I found who I did defined who I was. So naturally when I no longer was doing things as I once did, figuring out who I was had to be redefined. “What is my purpose?” Becomes a serious question to answer?  

4. When you were 20, did you think that your life would take you along the pathway you have been going?

I felt my life calling at an early age. I think I was 16-17 years old when I figured out what I wanted to do. But that meant I had to go to school to be able to do what I wanted to do. At the time I did not like school much and after a couple years of college decided it just was not worth the effort. So, I quit school and took a job selling shoes. I truly loved the shoe business. I was very good selling shoes. However, I did find ways to follow my original calling in volunteer type work. Basically, one can do what one wants if they don’t have to be paid for it. Especially if there is a need for the work done. Sometimes one can even be paid, but it just won’t be as much.

5.  Is there anything you would have done differently if you had the chance to relive part of your life?

Looking back, I would have stayed in school. But, maybe not. I think I learned to appreciate it more, the way I worked it all out. Going back and finally finishing in the way I finished, was very rewarding. I had advantages of life work and experiences to draw from.

5. Has your self-confidence changed since 20 or 30?

The process of growing older can be a very humbling experience. Having the misfortune of staying in a hospital for any length of time one can experience one can lose sense of modesty. Growing older can do that to self-confidence in similar ways. Driving in traffic, going places alone, attempting to work physically, all take on different confidence testing areas.

6. Have any of the changes associated with growing older seemed particularly dramatic to you? If so, please describe them.

Doing simple things, like walking a block, bending over to tie your shoes, going to the store alone can at times be challenging. Driving places at night. It surprises me how the stress level has changed. All my life, I have enjoyed driving and that was in all kinds of weather and time of day. I still can drive fine, however, I now would prefer others drive.

7. What do you like most about your life now? How does that differ from what you liked most 10 years ago?

I really enjoy retirement. I now don’t have a schedule to do things. I can do them when and if I want. I can sleep late and stay up late. I now tend to be a night owl. I don’t have to get up until I want. I can go fishing when I want and when I don’t want.

8. What do you like least about your life now? How does that differ from what you liked least 10 years ago?

I have neuropathy and my feet and legs, and I have a lot of pain. As I take medication for the problem, it makes me sleep a lot. At times this is debilitating and frustrating.

9. (If relevant) When your children left home, what kinds of emotional reactions did you have?

The four children left in different ways. It seemed we move about the time several moved. Susie, our youngest said, “Most kids grow up and leave home. Not us, I grew up, and you guys left.” As parents, we recognize that little birds, grow up and leave the nest. Our kids are always welcome to come home. That goes for their families. We see that as being a parent. (note, it is a good feeling to see our kids in the adult role and be who they are as adults. When they each left our house to go be adults, it was hard to see them go, and yet, it was time for them to go.  I guess, in one sense of the word, it was good to see them go. They needed to go. We needed them to go. Not that we wanted them to…. There comes a time when a child needs to grow up and parents must let them do that.

10. (If relevant) When you retired from your job, what kinds of emotional reactions did you have?

I was given a retirement party when I retired. As I left the party, I felt a sense of accomplishment, but also like a large load was off my back. I felt a sense of relief and that responsibility was finally over. I have been able to let go of what I was doing and seek new ways to find purpose. The best part, over the last year, I think is I feel I really don’t need a purpose anymore only to love my family and each day as it comes. As I said earlier, I really like being retired. I enjoy each day and can thank God for the day brings. Kind of weird isn’t it…. ?

11. (If relevant) How did you feel when your first grandchild was born?

I was totally excited when Terry was born. I very much looked forward to be a grandpa. I honestly have felt the same with each grandchild (4). I will say, with the birth of a great grandchild now… that too has been very exciting.

12. What are your plans and goals for the future? How have those changed over the last few years?

When one reaches 70 plus years old plans and goals change greatly. I recognize, I will not live forever. I want to somehow finish life correctly. I’m not sure what that might detail. I am not afraid of death and my faith helps bring me comfort. I would like my grandchildren to know me better. I would like them to know how faith in God, the Bible, and the Church has shaped my life and how it has given me significance, purpose, and direction for living. Why I spent more than 60 years, do what I did as a pastor.  

13. What are your biggest fears for the future? Why do you think you feel this way?

My biggest fear, is that I might reach a place physically, that I cannot take care of myself and I become a burden for my wife and family. To lose self-sufficiency for me would be very hard. (one day I may/ will have to cross that bridge. Not something I want.) The other part I think is one that will happen…. That a day comes, that it will not have mattered that I was here. Life for me is summed up as significance, and purpose, 

14. Do you feel that people treat you differently because of your age? In what ways?

Yes, some see me as an old man that cannot possibly understand them or what they want and need. Others recognize that I have tons of experiences and know a great deal. These send me little tests and ask me questions. 

15. Please tell me anything else you would like me to know about how it feels to be at this stage in your life.

I truly find each day as a kind of adventure.  Each day is new. There are new aches and pains. Life can have pain, hurt, frustration.  but it is life.  if we don't have adversity, I am not sure we are living.  Adversity is not the enemy.  Giving up . Losing faith. Losing hope. Losing love.  That would be for me would be the greatest loss.  Bring on the new day.  Bring on living to the fullest.  Give me that mountain.  Bring it on.  When one storms the gaits of hell, sometimes all we need is time.... Lets get'er done. 

Romans 8 New International Version (NIV)

Life Through the Spirit

8 Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, ² because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you^[a] free from the law of sin and death. ³ For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh,^[b] God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering.^[c] And so he condemned sin in the flesh, ⁴ in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.

⁵ Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. ⁶ The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. ⁷ The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. ⁸ Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.

⁹ You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. ¹⁰ But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life^[d] because of righteousness. ¹¹ And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of^[e] his Spirit who lives in you.

¹² Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. ¹³ For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.

¹⁴ For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. ¹⁵ The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.^[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,^[g] Father.” ¹⁶ The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. ¹⁷ Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

Present Suffering and Future Glory

¹⁸ I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. ¹⁹ For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. ²⁰ For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope ²¹ that^[h] the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.

²² We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. ²³ Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. ²⁴ For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? ²⁵ But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

²⁶ In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. ²⁷ And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

²⁸ And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who^[i] have been called according to his purpose. ²⁹ For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. ³⁰ And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

More Than Conquerors

³¹ What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? ³³ Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. ³⁴ Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. ³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ³⁶ As it is written:

“For your sake we face death all day long;
    we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”^[j]

³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸ For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[k] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹ neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.